Introducing the “Demon Hell-Chicken O’Saurus”

TvyamNb-BivtNwpvn7Sct0VFDulyAfA9wBcU0gVHVnqC5ghpxwCm4toNBf-29LtGiGU28bF0u4Gjkzw752cSometimes I post stuff just because I can, and there’s no way I’m not posting this.  Some paleontologists recently announced the discovery of a new type of Big_BIrddinosaur they’ve affectionately titled “the chicken from hell.”  Well, not so much a discovery but more a new perspective on a species they’ve know about for a while. Described as a feathered, 7-foot tall monster that looks “like a cross between a reptile and an emu,” its official name is “Anzu wyliei” but those crazy scientists are sticking with “chicken from hell” as the colloquial.  I have to admit–there’s something familiar about this bad boy, something I just can’t put my finger on.  Hmmmm…what can it be?

Okay, not all that funny, right.  I’m not lying about this feathery titan, however.  It’s the real damn deal.  They’ve got bones and everything, in this little museum right down the road from us called, er, The Carnegie Museum of Natural History, which is fairly awesome, by the way–plan your vacation now–it’s connected to the Carnegie Museum of Art and there’s a great noodle shop half a block up the street.

chicken-hellBut I digress.  This giant bird thing is (was) real, and it’s totally badass (notice my penchant for fitting that word into every blog entry I write?*).  Like Kevin Costner, it was known to stalk the plains,particularly the Dakotas, back when they were swampy and humid.

I’m unabashedly in love with this beast–it’s that cool, but the big brain guys down in Pittsburgh need to shrug off this foreign-sounding “Anzu wyliei” stuff and give it a good, old-fashioned tradtional hyperbolic name–working forward on the “chicken from hell” theme I’m going to go with Demon Hell-Chicken O’Saurus.  Has a ring to it, don’t you think?

*I am not-so-quietly advocating for the acceptance of this word in the connected, non-hyphenated form:  not “bad ass” or “bad-ass,” just badass.  It can be both a noun or adjective, but “badassed” is also an acceptable adjective form.  The act of being a continual badass is “badassery,” and trough habitual–and preferably unintentional, un-self-conscious badassery one may eventually reach that heightened state of being known as “badassness.”


About JunkChuck

Native, Militant Westsylvanian (the first last best place), laborer, gardener, and literary hobbyist (if by literary you mean "hack"). I've had a bunch of different blogs, probably four, due to a recurring compulsion to start over. This incarnation owes to a desire to dredge up the best entries of the worst little book of hand-scrawled poems I could ever dream of writing, salvageable excerpts from fiction both in progress and long-abandoned. and a smattering of whatever the hell seems to fit at any particular moment. At first blush, I was here just to focus on old, terrible verse, but I reserve the right to include...anything. Maybe everything, certainly my love of pulp novels growing garlic, the Pittsburgh Steelers and howling at the moon--both figuratively and, on rare occasions, literally.
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