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Commentary Funny and/or Strange

A Note on Proofreading…

An attractive young woman approached me in the kitchen early this morning and complained about the seeming lack of proofreading on Old Road Apples, forcefully implying my carelessness (carefree-ness) regarding edits was bringing shame to the entire household.  I couldn’t help but agree.  Things are a real mess.

It’s appalling, really.  I don’t know how any of you manage to put up with it. but I’m grateful that you have.

Junk Chuck
The Writer

The guy who writes this blog, however, is pretty stubborn–and utterly indifferent to the travails he inflicts upon his readers.

He says, “I’m here to write fast and dirty, to get it done and get the hell out–or post some stupid picture or video when I don’t feel like writing.”

Frankly, this guy is a bit of a jerk, this writer fellow, but he’s the best we can get on the budget we have.  Despite that, we’ve fired him straight up, at least a half dozen times, but he just comes back the next morning (or he posts a picture and sleeps in).  What can we do?  He’s too big to move by force–and no none else wants the job.

We also feel bad for the fellow.  He’s not getting any younger, and it seems like the wrong words come out of his fingers–“him” when he meant to say “her,” or “on” when he wanted to write “over.” I’ve seen places where he loses track in the middle of a paragraph and stomps his way out through the underbrush.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason to it, and it’s not like he has some gloriously dramatic drug-addled back story to justify his failings. The guy is just old, like my last truck. Worn out. Rusty wiring. Sloppy valves. Catalytic converter going bad–there’s this odor.  But I  don’t feel right selling him off as salvage–he was good, once, or at least serviceable.  Also, we get a charitable deduction to offset some of the insane profits we make from selling Old Road Apples Official Products, simply for keeping him around.

So, we’ll see what we can do to pay a little more attention to editing, since the ranting stream of semi-consciousness doesn’t seem to be working for everyone, some of whom are all stuck on nit-picked minutiae like posts “being readable” and “making sense”–things the writer finds to be tedious and, I suspect, a little beneath him.  (Did I tell you about his delusions of grandeur?) .  In the meantime, thanks for your patience and understanding.

The Management.